Does that happen to you when you make a lot of plans with a lot of people and none of them materialize? It's happening to me this week and adds heavily to my staying-at-home-lethargy and makes me wish I could go *click* (because let's face it, this is the virtual world) and have this completely together and very, very clear life.
You know those people who are all standing tall and know exactly what they want in life? I want to be them right now. Ooh, and because I often have songs/music playing in my head according to the situation like background music in a movie, I can't wait for the moment till the following songs play as the background music in my life (Hmm... Must find better, more meaningful things to mull over in head):
- A Moment Like This by Kelly Clarkson
- I Can See Clearly Now by Johny Nash
- Perfect Day by Hoku - OST Legally Blonde (but admittedly, it does play in my life now and then)
- Several other songs, which I might add in later, but too lazy to think of right now. Do you have any?
...and, who am I kidding, most songs that play at the end of movies. I guess everyone just wants happy-ending moments in life. I know people say that happiness comes from within and that whether to be happy or not is a decision, but how does one just 'become' happy? I usually have a very Bridget Jones frame of mind going on, and I feel...clueless, to say the least. And please, this is so not about finding (or the problems with, as the case may be) love, or fulfilling a certain goal. I read this lovely post by Disguise a while ago and thought I want that. But whether that will ever happen, and whether, assuming it does happen, I would, at the end of the day not feel totally lost, remains to be seen.
This is a picture I clicked at Como (Italy) in a great big hurry (as I clicked most of my pictures) because G and CC kept walking on quickly. I don't blame them, of course. I guess the best way to get pictures the way you want them (angle, light, and so on) is to
(a)be alone, which *yawn* is not really fun...besides the obvious fact that it's not feasible when you're new to a place with limited time to spend.
(b)go for a photo-walk, with other like-minded, trigger-crazy people. But who gets to choose the place? And also, it can look kind of strange to an outsider- a herd of camera-brandishing people all moving together and clicking things that seem to have no relevance whatsoever - also not a great option for when you're new to a place. AND, how to get people for a photo-walk when you're new to a place?
Heh, waddya know, I'm back to square one. But I should mention here that the CMYK phtowalks in Goa (from the photography class I did way back in May, about which you can read here) used to be so much of fun. Back to photography - I want a nice DSLR - I wantIwantIwantIwant. I'd even stamp my feet and grovel on the floor - but we must be responsible mature adults. Huh. The problem, as I have explained before, is simple - it all comes down to money. But do you think, may be, just may be, it will appear as though out of nowhere, on my approaching, impending birthday and we will have a happily ever after with lots of shutter-speeding, tele-lensing, manual-focusing fun? If only. On the other hand, if I was given a DSLR that was my very own, I would almost certainly die an early death from clicking too many photos. Hell, I even do that with digital cameras and mobile cameras. This one time, in one particular bout of what I believed at the time was a moment of photographic epiphany, I clicked several pictures of my hand. And I wasn't drunk or on medication. So you see. May be it's a good thing I don't have a DSLR.
Did I mention I was reading 'P.S - I Love You'? Oh, and did I mention I was reading it in German? Yeah baby. I'm very cool like that (is what I thought when I started off. Then I realized there are several words I don't understand and that brought me back to reality. But I do get the gist of most things and have almost reached the end now. So, yay!)
I have all intentions of an early start to my day for tomorrow, so I must away. Don't stay up too late y'all. And yes, drink lots of water. And why yes, I have reached my writing saturation-point, how did you know?